AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Update: I had to change the name of this post because the length of it was making my sidebar act all crazy. Who'd a thunk??)

You know what the best part is about totally giving up hope???

It often makes the universe spit beer out through its nose.

EXHIBIT A:

As of 3:30 PM today, July 9, 2007, I have accepted an offer of employment with REALLY FRAKKIN AWESOME PLACE TO WORK, LIKE I TOTALLY COULDN'T IN A SQUAZILLION YEARS COME UP WITH A MORE-PERFECT JOB FOR ME ANYWHERE, EVER, AT ANY TIME. Seriously.

(For about three grand a year more than I WAS making.)

Insert exclamation-points.
And asterisks.
And the Happy Happy Joy Joy dance.
And beer.

And a HUGE, GINORMOUS, LUNG-COLLAPSING sigh of relief.

I might be able to keep my house now.
The world will now OFFICIALLY not fall apart, no matter what happens.
Dude.
This is so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so so so so so so awesome.

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan.
To whichever of the many, many deities which have been invoked on my behalf, from various friends, family, and acquaintances:
THANK YOU.
so. damn. much.
Also to the various friends, family, and acquaintances who invoked said deities in the first place:
THANK YOU TOO.

And get this: the schedule even takes into account my weird-ass biorhythms. Instead of 8-5, which would mean I get up at 6? It's 10:30AM-6PM. Tu-Sat. So I get a "real" day off every week, and I get to keep hours which are way more attuned to my reality. AND I get to avoid the worst of the rush-hour traffic, should I decide to drive. Which I don't have to, because: buses. Lots of them.

And FURTHER furthermore? It has been very clearly explained to me, the criteria on which I will be judged when it comes to performance, reviews, and my 90-day probationary period. So it's not like the last place, where they threw something at me and said "learn this" and then fired me because they didn't think I was learning it fast enough.

If anyone needs me, I will be melting into a puddle of gratitude somewhere.

Because just at the moment? I am so floored, I am out of words.