Everybody Goes Somewhere

Well, as you might have guessed from that last post (pissed-off as it was), my short-lived interlude is over; he went back home, having changed plans due to some personal stuff. I can't be angry about it; I'm angry at myself, though, for letting down the walls even a little bit. I won't do that again. It's a pretty clear measure of how lonely I've been, though.

And THAT is overshadowed by the OTHER news of the day: I got a text message from an unknown number this morning, but between the spelling and the content it was pretty easy to tell who'd written it:

i been locked up and everything and i been worried about u is u ok girl call me

To which I replied, in my own mind at least, "?!!!??!!"

You have to understand: LJ prided himself on never having been caught. He lives in Chicago all his adult life, running around surrounded by more weed than the average organic farmer, and flies free despite some of the dumbest moves imaginable-- then he moves to Podunk McNowhere and one of his friends snitches on him and he gets jailed in a midnight raid...not to mention losing his cell phone with all the numbers. He was only able to get my cell phone number by calling his friend whose phone I'd subsidized for a couple of years. And then, apparently for some time, he couldn't get me to answer THAT--apparently the cause of that oh-so-slightly-comforting "worried"--because, of course, it was sitting uncharged in the bottom of my Bag of Damnation, along with three ink pens, a half a pack of gum, and the receipt for a grilled chicken sandwich. Only bill collectors ever call that number anyway, so what's the point of keeping it charged? (Yes, yes--"for emergencies". I know. I don't have enough of a LIFE to have an "emergency". Lately, "emergency" in my life involves being out of orange juice, or having been attacked by a festering ex-food item from the back of my fridge. And for that, I have a REAL phone.)

Apparently his mother and his girl bonded him out of jail (sure glad I'm not his girl at the moment!!) and he's got a lawyer, who says he's got a pretty good chance to beat the case--not enough vegetable matter, for one thing (barely enough to constitute "personal use", let alone "intent to deliver") and a bunch of irregularities in the warrant. Of course, EVERY defense lawyer says that. But since this IS his first arrest, he'll probably get off light.

But again--despite the "worried", which today was at least salve for my wounded pride--I'm certainly glad I'm not his girlfriend at the moment.

I was going to call him anyway, because (drum roll please): this Friday, as soon as the check clears, I will have made the FINAL payment on the Vehicle of the Damned, the Mighty 'Ho. Not to have that $445 a month hanging over my head every month, nor to ever again see the dreaded word "Nationwide" on my caller ID when my payment is eleven seconds late...I believe I have found on earth all I will ever need of heaven, really, when I think about those two conditions. (Seriously, if you're ever in Chicago or anywhere else, and you have crappy credit and someone tries to push you to a finance company called "Nationwide" with headquarters on North Cicero Avenue in Chicago? Don't walk away. Don't even run away. FLY away. Grab your children and your pocketbook and flee, flee the evil that is Nationwide. This isn't the same Nationwide that advertises on TV--they're an insurance company, and I'm sure they're a very nice one--but the Nationwide that finances loans in Chicago is a den of evil, and should be avoided at any and all costs. I've warned you, now; heed my counsel and save your mortal souls.)

So, to recap: LJ goes to jail, Really Hot Man goes home, and Gladys goes...quietly to bed, I guess, now that she doesn't have to keep the house clean and the bikini-area landscaped in anticipation of unannounced visitors. Sad, a little, but also liberating.

Mostly sad, I think....but I'll live. I always do.

A Very Bloggy Day, Apparently

I've noticed that my blogging is either feast or famine--I can go for ten days with nothing to say, and then all of a sudden I've got a million ideas. But I couldn't let this one go by. This is just the...I mean....Who DOES something like....??

The news story which is currently rendering me completely speechless:

Is here. A brief summary, because links expire and I know people hate clicking: Some guy in Texas died of alcohol poisoning; his wife was charged with murder because it was suspected that she gave him an ENEMA with SHERRY, and the absorbed alcohol was what did him in. Testimony in the case included the following:

In a 2005 interview, Warner said her husband often drank alcohol, but that he had been addicted to enemas since he was a child. She said he often used alcohol in that manner to get drunk.

--from the above article

My reactions, after "eeeeewwww..."

1. I didn't know you could DO that, much less that it could kill you.

2. Who on earth DISCOVERED that possibility? I mean, I've heard the old joke about "who was the first person to look at a raw oyster and think 'mmm! I'm gonna try that!'" but THIS is...wow.

3. Who would make a HABIT of this? Again--I'm not the one to talk about habits, but there's a substantial difference between...(Okay, thinking about the main reaction to those to whom I've told my story, when they've found out about the bit with the needles, maybe not a SUBSTANTIAL difference. But a difference, nonetheless. I simply cannot fathom the concept of being "addicted" to enemas. That, to me, is something happening in the WRONG direction. That door is marked EXIT; it is not an entrance.)

4. I'm sure I mentioned this already, but: eeeeewwwww.

Arrgh.

I know it's fashionable to bash the traditional media for not being connected to the "new media"--by which they mean, electronic and viral media--and far be it from me to jump on the bandwagon...

...but man, they're gonna have to do better than this (seen on tonight's chyron on Fox News Chicago (WFLD) 10:00 newscast):

(something something) "...Joining the 'Blagosphere'".

If the story had been about Illinois politics, I could see it as an intentional, albeit hackneyed, pun (for my out-of-state friends, our governor's name is Blagojevich, and he's commonly referred to (among many, many less-flattering names) as "Blago", pronounced "bloggo", hence "Blago-sphere", ha ha freakin' ha)...

...but the story had absolutely NOTHING to do with Illinois. The story was about student journalists in Texas who were partnering with Fox News to deliver "new-media" content regarding the primaries and the 2008 election. The word "Illinois" was not mentioned even once during the story.

All of which leads me to these inescapable conclusions: not only does the guy in charge of creating the chyron text for the 10 PM newscast not know how to spell "blog", but he hasn't seen it out of the punny, old-media context to realize that "blagosphere" is not the correct spelling of the term; furthermore, either the individual doing the proofreading for the chyron guy fell down on the job (excusable, I guess) or he/she doesn't know the proper spelling of the term EITHER (just completely, utterly SCARY.)

Sometimes it's nearly impossible NOT to take a ride on the bandwagon.

Oh No He Di-n't: STFU, Drew, Part 2

(background here for non-Chicagoans, or for Chicagoans who slammed bricks through their TVs, radios, computers and newspapers long ago)

Is there SERIOUSLY no depth this individual will not plumb?