Monday, June 14, 2004

Another One In The Books

LJ forgot my birthday.



He was on the block last night, came home sometime before I woke up, ate and went to bed. I woke up when the plumber showed up in the middle of the afternoon, and I puttered and watched the race til LJ woke up around 6 PM. By 7, when he hadn't said anything, I put on my shoes, gathered up my bag, and headed for the door. "Where are you going?" he asked me, and I said, "Just out."



In reality I was going to the movies, and I sent him a text message while I waited for the bus. "Just so u don't get the wrong idea, I'm going 2 the movies. I'm not gonna sit at home on my birthday--that would just be pathetic."



A few minutes later, while sitting on the bus, I got this in reply: "Be safe, we'll talk later." I think that's as close to an apology as the man will ever come, and it will have to do, I guess. But I have to admit, it hurts like hell. And what was worse, the bus ride took me up Western, past all the places I remember from JP. I remember when JP and I used to run this city til all hours of the night, together--and oh, god, how I miss that. LJ and I do our separate things, and never do anything together--other than sleep and occasionally eat. I just miss that companionship, though I understand LJs choices and his reasons--I just hate that he doesn't want to spend more time with me.



Anyway, I went to see Shrek 2 and it was really cute. When I got home, LJ was still here; he didn't mention it, and neither did I. A while later he left for the block. So that was that.



I think he knows he fucked up, but I don't think he's gonna do anything to make it right--which just makes me sad, really. But short of leaving, there's nothing I can do.

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